How Adoption Laws Balance the Right to Know and Privacy

Posted on June 18th, 2025 

Adoption in the UK isn’t just about court papers and family reshuffles—it’s tangled up in real lives, personal histories, and a quiet tug-of-war between knowing and not knowing. 

While laws here try to walk the line between privacy and truth, they don’t actually require adoptive parents to tell children they’re adopted. 

Yep, that’s right. You could be 30, sipping tea, and still not know you were adopted unless someone decides to spill the beans. But that’s starting to change. 

People who’ve been through the care system are pushing back, demanding more openness. 

For them, it’s not just curiosity—it’s about identity, health, and being treated like a grown adult who deserves to know where they come from. 

The legal system might think it’s keeping things tidy, but behind the scenes, it’s a lot messier than that. 

And if you've ever wondered how much your past really matters or who gets to decide what you’re allowed to know. 

Getting Familiar with Adoption Laws in the UK 

Adoption in the UK isn’t just about finding children new homes—it’s about finding that tricky middle ground between giving adoptees the truth about their origins and protecting birth parents' right to privacy. 

These aren’t just lofty ideals; they’re baked right into the legal backbone of the process. 

The Adoption and Children Act 2002 is the main player here, shaping how every adoption unfolds. 

The law puts the child’s welfare front and centre, making sure stability and permanence aren’t just buzzwords but baked into the process from start to finish. 

That said, adoption law doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It lives and breathes in real stories—of people looking for answers, trying to piece together who they are, and figuring out how much of their past they’re allowed to claim. 

Here are three key laws that shape the adoption journey in the UK:  

Adoption and Children Act 2002 – This sets out the framework, ensuring the child’s needs come first while also recognising the rights of all parties involved.  

Access to Birth Records Regulations 2005 – Once someone turns 18, they can request their original birth certificate and adoption records.  

Adoption Contact Register – Allows adopted individuals and birth relatives to signal if they want to be contacted, helping manage expectations and boundaries.  

Now, this might all sound very procedural—but behind each form and formality is a deeply personal journey. Gaining access to a birth certificate at 18 might seem straightforward on paper, but in reality, it can be a turning point. 

Suddenly, what was once a mystery might come with names, places, or even unanswered questions. 

That’s why the system also allows for contact to be handled through intermediary agencies—people trained to overcome the emotional minefields that can come with reconnecting lives once separated. 

As social attitudes shift, so do these laws. Privacy used to mean secrecy. Now it’s starting to look more like a choice. 

Tools like the Adoption Contact Register let people set their own boundaries—some want a reunion, others just want closure, and a few might not be ready for anything at all. 

To identify and to protect aren’t opposites—they’re two sides of the same coin. The laws try to honour both, knowing that while names on a page can’t tell the full story, they’re often where that story begins. 

Exploring the Right to Know In Regards To Adoption 

For many adoptees, there’s an itch that never quite goes away—a deep, personal need to know where they came from. It's not about idle curiosity or poking around for drama. 

It’s about figuring out their identity, history, and how the pieces of a life fit together. In the UK, the “Right to Know” isn’t just a poetic phrase. It’s built into adoption law, giving adults who were adopted the legal path to uncover their beginnings. 

At 18, adoptees can apply for their original birth certificate and adoption records. That moment can be huge. Some discover new branches of family trees; others get answers to questions they’ve carried their entire lives. 

Medical background? Cultural roots? A name that suddenly explains a middle name they never understood? It all matters. But with every hopeful reunion, there’s also the possibility of distance or silence. 

That’s the hard truth: the Right to Know doesn't always guarantee the right to connect. 

Take Claire. She knew she was adopted and always wondered about her birth mother. When she turned 18 and opened that envelope, what followed was a tearful reunion with someone who had been waiting, hoping, and ready. Then there’s Paul, whose birth mother wasn’t in the same place emotionally. 

She wasn’t ready to revisit the past—but even knowing her name gave him closure; a missing piece finally snapped into place. These aren’t dramatic exceptions; they’re snapshots of how powerful—and unpredictable—this journey can be. 

Thankfully, adoptees aren’t expected to go through this alone. Support networks, counsellors, and intermediary agencies are in place to offer a soft landing if the road gets rocky. 

They help manage contact requests, prepare individuals emotionally, and offer coping strategies if things don’t go to plan. It’s not just about finding someone—it’s also about being ready for what comes next. 

The Adoption Contact Register steps in here, letting people on both sides signal if they’re open to contact or prefer distance. It puts the power into the hands of those directly involved, letting them define what connection means on their terms. 

Ultimately, the Right to Know isn’t about opening doors blindly—it’s about giving people the choice to look through them. And when they do, what they find might not be perfect, but it’s theirs—and that’s what makes it matter. 

Reasonable Expectations of Privacy and How To Provide It 

In adoption, privacy isn’t just a preference—it’s a protected right and quite a sensitive one at that. When we talk about a “reasonable expectation of privacy”, especially in the UK, we’re dealing with the assumption that no one’s personal details—especially the painful or complex bits—should be shared without their say-so. This idea is backed by both common law and the Human Rights Act 1998, and in adoption, it plays a particularly important role. 

Birth parents might have handed over legal rights, but that doesn’t mean they handed over their personal narratives. 

For some, keeping their background confidential is about protecting themselves from reliving trauma. For others, it’s a way of maintaining boundaries that were emotionally necessary at the time of adoption. 

These aren’t just wishes—they’re rights, carefully considered by law and respected through a legal framework that isn’t there to shut people out but to keep everyone safe. 

In practice, reasonable expectations of privacy can include:  

Keep identifying information confidential unless explicit consent is given.  

Restricting direct contact unless facilitated and agreed upon by both parties.  

Respecting the emotional and psychological space of birth parents after adoption takes place.  

The tension between privacy and identity isn’t a design flaw—it’s the whole challenge. One person’s right to know might bump straight into someone else’s right not to relive a painful chapter. 

Even in situations where an adoptee gains access to records, that doesn’t mean they get full disclosure. Details are often filtered or anonymised to preserve privacy without entirely closing the door on connection. It’s a compromise—carefully struck and constantly evolving. 

Privacy in adoption isn’t about secrecy for the sake of it. It’s about recognising that lives don’t reset after papers are signed. It’s about allowing everyone involved—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive families—to move forward at their own pace. 

When privacy is respected, the possibility for real, respectful connection becomes far more likely. And when handled with care, the law isn’t just a gatekeeper—it’s a pillar of support. 

Why The Laws Lag Behind and What Can You Do In The Meantime 

The tension between privacy and identity in adoption isn’t just legal—it’s deeply human. 

While the law slowly evolves to meet the emotional realities of modern families, many are left unravelling complex histories and unanswered questions on their own. Adoptees may search for clarity; birth parents may guard hard-won privacy. 

The challenge? The legal system isn’t always quick to catch up with lived experience. 

When the law lags behind the emotional reality, families are left holding stories that ache to be heard. Our care-experienced-informed therapy offers a safe, non-judgemental space to explore the impact of identity, secrecy, and belonging—together. 

At Susan Vickers Foundation, our mission is to walk with you through the emotional terrain of adoption and care experience. 

As the law shifts, our support adapts, offering grounding for individuals and families dealing with deeply personal crossroads. 

If you're ready to take the next step, we're here to walk it with you. You can reach out via email at [email protected].

Your story deserves to be heard—with respect and a little help along the way.